Brian

So i am ignoring Brian again. I stopped responding to him 11:39am on 08-11-10. He said "Hi" at 9:17pm. I still haven't responded. My record is 4 days. Here we go. He says i annoyed him but i was trying to tell him something and i didn't say it fast enough or the way i wanted to so it came out wrong and i hurt him. I didn't mean to. I love him but as Sherri says if u love something enough then you can let it go and maybe that's what needs to be done. Maybe me and him shouldn't be friends anymore. My love for him hurts so bad. I have painful scars on my heart from him. I was hoping he would go with me on the 25th but i guess he wont. That just shows that working is more important then me. I gave him enough notice to take the day off or something. I am scared for my life and it makes me feel he doesn't care because he just says tell me to tell him how it went instead of being an active part. He has made so many promises to me and continues to break them and yet i still give him chances. Sometimes i wonder y we ever went out. I would still marry him if he asked. I believe one day he will become the man he wants to be and it will make me so happy that he has reached a place in his life that he could be happy. I want to think in some small way that i might have had even small effect on him. I know he has to do alot alone but he will have to learn to accept some help at some time. No one can do everything alone.
So i decided I want to get my tatt on September 20th which is my half birthday but that being a Monday i figured Sunday but Sunday happens to be Brad's birthday so now i don't know again. Maybe the 25th ? I really wanted to do it in August but with the biopsy and coloposy and the trip and trying to get things in order i guess it will have to wait.